Do I need to have two games? One for the server and one for me to be able to play?
No. You can host the server and run your client on the same PC you don't need a VM.
He was talking about something else.
If your server doesn't show up on the server list do the following:
Windows search > cmd, open cmd
type "ipconfig" no quotes hit enter
copy ipv4 address
now ingame open the console with "~" key.
any player who wants to join server can type the following
"connect "ipv4 address":4977"
eg "connect XXX.XXX.X.XXX:4977"
If your server is password protected enter "password "type password here"" in the console before using the "connect" command.
If they still haven't fixed the bug where you can't start the client with the server running.
Launch client first, then launch server, use port 4977 in the server config files and connect command.
If it's been fixed you should be able to use 4976. But I'm still using 4977 and starting server after client and can confirm that method still works.